American Idol 8 - And The Winner Is...

The audience! Wow, Fox actually spent some money or used some powerful influence, as the guest stars were more than appropriate for the television event of the year. Even the "meh" guests like Keith Urban and Queen Latifah weren't awful. In fact, the most awful thing was listening to poor Sarver and Cockring sing along with Steve Martin's fiddle playing. Screw comedy, fiddle is "serious business!" Kris won, but Adam was not disrespected by any means getting to be a lead singer with KISS and then sharing the stage with Kris and the remaining members of Queen. He's got so much vocal talent he could be the new Freddy Mercury or new lead singer for KISS. So perhaps this will turn out better for him, but the tweentards got their revenge for last season's Arculeta-fail. So congrats to the Dark Horse, the guy with less vocal talent than McBlind, Matt, Allison, Danny, and Adam to name a few.

Oh and even the cheesy Idol awards were good because they brought back the only three early-round contestants that mattered: Tatiana, Nick/Normund, and bikini girl. It's nice to see Idol appreciate what makes them so great while also doing it on their biggest stage for the real competitiors. Moment of the night goes to Kara dioguardi, who took a break from slobbering all over the sausage fest top 13 to show that she's got a tight bikini body and a better voice than "enhanced" bikini girl. Bravo Kara, bravo.

Oh and the Black Eyed Peas are back, which means no more solo Fergie awfulness on my radio for at least a couple years. Hallelujah!

THIS WEEK: 1/1
FINALS: 8/13 (61.5%)
OVERALL: 14/22 (63.6%)

Despite the upset, definitely looking forward to next season. Hopefully they learn from some mistakes this season and make it even better. After all, without Idol, just what the hell would I blog about? Have a good summer!

American Idol Finale - Season 8 yawns to the finish

Unlike David Cook and David Archuleta, this showdown wasn't as good as a Gokey-Lambert showdown could have been. At least we have a rocker in the final 2 again, but Adam showed his softer side this evening to pander to the judges and probably to the voters. Which just made him look mediocre on the finale stage. Simon Cowell clearly learned from last year when he declared Arculeta a clear winner despite the clear evidence to the contrary...so he thinks Adam should win and rightfully so on the entire season's effort, but Kris held his own and always seems to get by these people with more talent than him (Allison, Gokey, and arguably even Matt Giraud had more talent than Kris). So if people are voting on tonight's performances, Kris will surely win. I'm guessing this will be much much closer than the past two season finales, and maybe the cloest Idol voting ever. If it is, Seacrest will let us know to further crush the feelings of whomever loses. Oh and Simon was spot-on about Kara's writing "talent," it's all a bunch of boundaries and hurricanes and shit. Blech.

Let's face it...the true winner this season was Normund Gentle. But anyways, here's my rapid fire grade of all the performances tonight.

PERSONAL CHOICE
Adam - "Mad World" - Everyone who DVR's Idol missed this entire performance and Simon giving him a standing O last time. This time was not as good. GRADE: B
Kris - "Ain't No Sunshine" - No no no. Kris, just play the damn guitar. Judges loved this performance and I thought he picked one of his weakest songs. Poor job. GRADE: C-

PRODUCER CHOICE
Adam - "A Change Is Gonna Come" - Best performance of the night, which is disappointing because this would've clocked in behind even Archuleta's best finale song last year. GRADE: A-
Kris - "What's Going On" - Kris unleashes his inner Jason Castro or his Chi Alpha (yes he's a holy roller and my college pastor emaild me personally to ask me to vote for him...eff that) breakdown performance and it's just meh. Good job for him, but meh. GRADE: B

WINNER'S SONG - "No Boundaries"
Adam - The song doesn't fit Adam and he's really stretching to make his voice work into the song. Plus it's cheesy as hell. Seems like a better song for Kris, sadly. GRADE: C-
Kris - Nope, doesn't fit his voice either. Sigh. Kris is pitchy as all hell trying to find the notes an octave too high in the chorus. GRADE: D-

So by my count, it's a knockout for Adam. But to be fair, I'm judging on talent, which has nothing to do with how tweentards vote. Adam probably scares them, which is a shame. But considering the absolute dogshit on David Cook's first album thanks to Idol producers, maybe Kris Allen is more deserving of the "honor" of that recording contract. Despite my better judgment, I'm calling for the "upset" of the show right here.

WINNER OF AMERICAN IDOL SEASON 8 - Kris Allen
The real winner in life - Adam Lambert

American Idol 8 - The Cut To 2

So another week, another terrible results show. Skipped through the retarded beg for money and African kid dance, and still don't understand why they cannot come in under 1 hour on a results show with 24 seconds of substance. Kris and Adam were close in the voting, which bodes very poorly for Mr. Lambert next week because the tweentards back Kris and the red states back Kris. But I knew Danny was gone.

THIS WEEK: 1/1
FINALS: 7/12
OVERALL: 13/21

American Idol Top 3 - Judge's Pick

So this week we get the judge's pick. I sure hope Dream On and Ring of Fire are on the list, haha. We'll see what lame sappy songs the judges pick for our sausage fest 09. Off we go!

Danny Gokey - "Dance Little Sister" by Terrence Darby - Paula's Pick - Paula picks a song that feels straight out of her catalogue, but it's nice to see Danny do something upbeat that fits his voice and style. The bridge with the "doo doo doo" call and response with the saxophone was a pretty nifty little add-in. He was a little over the top as usual, but I cannot cmoplain about missing the pitch or anything like that. Good memorable song for the opener.
GRADE: B

Kris Allen - "Apologize" by One Republic - Kara and Randy's pick - Kris reminds us he can play piano too despite Matt and Scott having that most of the time this season. Worked out well for them too. Kris slows the song down which is a bad decision because it drags on like a funeral dirge a bit. Kris tries to show his vocal talent with spiking notes, but he cannot hit the glory notes in the chorus well enough. Mediocre as usual. The only thing memorable about this performance was the absolute boob show that broke out at the judge's table. WTF?
GRADE: C-

Adam Lambert -"One" by U2 - Simon's pick - Lambert has some interesting outfits in his closet amongst other things (har har), but this cloudy skies shirt is awful. Fits the song I guess. Simon picks a bad croony Bono song and of course the judges will love it but I don't think this presses any boundaries, which is what Adam is good for. He got a bit shouty in the center which was unenjoyable. This was mediocre, but what can you do with the song choice.
GRADE: C+

So the judge's picks were kind of lame, no surprise there. Carrie Underwood had the highlight of the night, asking an Afircan lady if her child has had malaria. She says no, and that "proves" the malaria bed nets are working. WTF?

Danny Gokey - "You Are You Beautiful" by Joe Cocker - No surprise, Danny had to go slow pace since Paula forced him to go upbeat. You know what made this song great for Joe? The voice. Danny has a nice voice but this song does not seem to fit him for that reason. As usual, the Gokester shouts through the only strong part of the song. This cheapens the glory note at the end since he's been oversinging for 15 seconds. This was merely OK. Judges loved it of course.
GRADE: C-

Kris Allen - "Heartless" by Kanye West - So we go from one mediocre overpopular R&B artist to another. Wonderful Kris. And we're back to the guitar. Going without the band is a pander to the judges. The problem is that Kris cannot carry a song with a distinctive of superb voice. He's merely OK, and this song choice just lets him meander around musically. The guitar playing is kind of meh. Better than Gokey which should make this interesting.
GRADE: C+

Adam "in the finals already" Lambert - "Cryin" by Aerosmith - Adam is just rubbing it in Gokey's face for last week, and I love it. I don't know how I feel about the loud backup singer, kind of detracts from the performance though I know it's used in the original. Glambert finds a way to glory note even more than Stephen Tyler which is hard to do! Nevertheless, this is the best performance of the night by a wide margin.
GRADE: A-

So there's your final three. I was expecting repeats, but this year no repeat performances and thank God. I don't watch to see repeats on this show. This will be very intriguing, as I really have no clue who is going home. VFTW doesn't have much pull at this stage, but maybe just maybe they can help Danny past Kris. I hope so, though the tweentards are coming out in force behind the worst contestant. I think the judges are throwing Adam in the final without thinking about it and that backfired last year with the Archulator in the final.

TOP PERFORMER: Adam Lambert
SAFE: Kris Allen
GOING HOME: Danny Gokey

American Idol 8 - The Cut to 3

So Allison continued the roller coaster in style, losing votes so much this week she went home. Surprised me but I guess people were comparing her directly to Adam thanks to duos or expected more out of her in her rock week. So it's officially sausage fest time, although a little later than expected and that's a good thing. Good luck to Allison.

THIS WEEK: 0/1
FINALS: 6/11
OVERALL: 12/20

American Idol Top 4 - The Real Talent Takes on Slash

So it's like Guitar hero, except this is really Slash and this is American Idol. But the real talents are left now and we have duets! That's right, the producers and judges cannot fit 8 songs in so they are doing duets! Let the terribleness commence woot woot! Slash knows how to actually do his own thing and has the Idols go full bore with a band. Nice!

Adam Lambert - "Whole Lotta Love" by Led Zepplin - Adam actually picks a damn good band and a rocking song, so kudos from the start. the outfit is pure punk rock, which may scare the tweentards. Unlike when he did Ring of Fire, this song actually is sexual and he flaunts it. The performance is good but did get a bit shouty at the beginning. Still, better than most on his theme night. At this rate there will be no bottom 2 this week.
GRADE: A-

Allison Iraheta - "Somebody to Love" by Janis Joplin - Allison goes to the glam crew of Adam this week, getting true rocker hair like amanda overmyer and some pants that looks like they came out of Disco Adam's closet. Joplin is a safe choice for her voice, but perhaps that is what she needs since the roller coaster ride is due to take her down this week if the trends continue. The performance was just mediocre, which is trouble in the top 4 stage.
GRADE: C

Kris and Danny duet - "Renegade" by Stix - This was a solid rock choice for a duet of guys, and surprising because so far the songs have actually been rock and not soft pop rock. Kris and Gokey's voices go not match very well in harmony. Kris was a little blah and Danny was little shouty, because otherwise Danny would have knocked Kris out of the park. This is a nice chance to really compare voices of guys and guys and girls and girls (sorry Adam!). Performance overall was OK.
KRIS GRADE: D+
DANNY GRADE: C+

Kris Allen - "Come Together" by The Beatles - Kris has a douchy moment with Slash, but at least he got to pee his pants while playing the best guitar he'll ever touch. Kris should've stuck with Revolution as this song doesn't fit him well. He's forcing his voice to be low and soulful which is more of a Gokey thing. Kris actually plays an electric guitar and does it decent. There's no glory notes in this song but Kris makes one. Something just doesn't seem great about this performance, maybe song choice.
GRADE: C-

Danny Gokey - "Dream On" by Aerosmith - Wow Danny picks a song where he can scream and shout louder than ever before. VFTW may indeed be onto something here, as he may be truly worse than Kris...but I like him better. Gokey even wears a vest and bright shirt like Stephen Tyler would, nice roleplay. Yeah doo doo doo not crap all over the middle of the riffs in the chorus please, there's enough flair in the song already. The signature scream was as bad as you would expect. This turned out to be god awful at the end.
GRADE: D-

Adam and Allison duet - "Slow Ride" by - I'm pretty sure Adam picked the song, but these are the true rockers tonight. Still would've liked to see Adam blast Danny off the stage in a duet, as it's not fun watching him blow Allison out of the water. Allison holds her own and has a decent performance. Adam is spot on again and is erasing the doubts right as Gokey has his first true missteps at the most critical time. This could be a finale preview, and that would be awesome if it comes true.
ADAM GRADE: A
ALLISON GRADE: B

So they actually did rock songs, and Danny fell flat on his face. While this is supposed to be the week Allison goes home if the pattern stays true, I went against my gut last week and should've picked Matt for the lock solid 4 in a row. Starting a new streak this week I hope.

TOP PERFORMER: Adam
SAFE: Adam, Allison
BOTTOM TWO: Danny, Kris
GOING HOME: Kris Allen

American Idol 8 - The Cut to 4

We now have a Final Four, and I don't think anybody is really mourning the loss of Matt. He really did deserve to go home 2 weeks ago, but he was indeed slightly better overall than Lil and Anoop. Adam in the bottom 3 or 2 instead of Allison was a shocker, but I think they just revealed that information to let America know to not drop the ball. Still, DC was never in the bottom 2/3 until the finals...so mark another one up for Gokey fans.

Next week is Rock and Roll, which is too broad of a theme but I can hope for true rocking with Slash at the helm. Probably will not happen, but dare to dream of no Phil Collins...

THIS WEEK: 0/1
FINALS: 6/10
OVERALL: 12/19

American Idol 8 - Rat Pack in the Top 5

So this week we get the smooth croning of Rat Pack music. There will be way too many glory notes added and Frank Sinatra should've been the mentor, but I guess Fox couldn't afford anyone that good. So Mr. "no suggestion" Jamie Foxx takes over. Thanks captain useless.

Kris Allen - "The Way You Look Tonight" - This was a mediocre performance, felt mailed in. Funny faces throughout and he doesn't fit this mold. He needs to step up at this stage and he's just not doing it. Paula says he's transformed into a distinguished gentlemen, but seriously, he looks like a young douche bag in a suit. Nice that they all wore classy suits tonight though, so no terrible outfits to speak of for once.
GRADE: C

Allison Iraheta - "Someone to Watch Over Me" - So now she's 17, yet still Randy and Jamie manage to painfully bring it up again that's she's 16 or 5 or whatever. Seriously, she's talented. Who cares that she's young? Maybe those gentlemen just keep saying it to keep from jumping her, hell I don't know. Oh sorry, it's Kara jumping everyone...not Randy. As for the performance, her rough edges showed which is why she's a rocker and not a crooner. She'll be in trouble, but this will be a hard week to call.
GRADE: C+

Matt Giraud - "My Funny Valentine" - This should be Matt's week, right? This theme fits him even better than Anoop after thinking about it. The big notes were a bit shouty for my liking, but it was a decent performance. He throws in stuff that doesn't work and really needed to knock it out of the park with this theme. As expected, even a perfect theme will not keep him from jeopardy.
GRADE: C -

Danny Gokey - "Come Rain or Come Shine" - It's sad that Matt is the one with all the Michigan soul and yet Danny out souls him every single week. It's probably got something to do with song choice and voice mechanics. Danny sings too much with his hands again. His performance was brilliant up until he grabbed the mike off the stand and started getting too heavy and oversinging again. Dramatic finishes shouldn't last 25 seconds.
GRADE: B

Adam Lambert - "Feeling Good" - The white suit proves that Glambert still is different. He has stage presence like nobody else, but he is a bordeline professional in the singing business. That could be longest glory note in Idol history but he's still better than everyone else. My pick to win it all will win it all, Gokey be damned.
GRADE: A-

This week I know we won't have a bottom three because that would be too obvious. Danny and Adam stood out, but how to sift through the other three is so hard. I will not be surprised if any of them goes home. I hope my streak of four ends, but alas, it appears to be sausage fest time.

TOP PERFORMER: Adam Lambert
SAFE: Adam Lambert, Danny Gokey, Kris Allen
BOTTOM TWO: Allison Iraheta, Matt Giraud
BUH-BYES: Allison Iraheta

American Idol 8 - The Cut To 5

Heavy cuts this week, but it didn't feel like it as Lil was gone in 60 seconds. Seriously Idol producers, way to make her feel terribad. But anyways, godbye pigment, and probably goodbye females next week if the bottom three is any indication. So it will be a sausage fest May on Idol. Oh well.

THIS WEEK: 2/2
FINALS: 6/9
OVERALL: 12/18

American Idol Top 7, Try 2 - We Got Night Fever Baby

That's right...Simon promised us some disco. This could be only rivaled by country week in the usual badness. We'll see the Idol producers continue to fail to get a show in on time yet being able to do it for 7 years before now. 7 enter, and this week...2 must leave. Fantastic!

Lil Rounds - "I'm Every Woman" by Chaka Khan - Lil wears a black spandex straight out of the era of this song, which is appreciated. Thanks for showing off what you got, blech. Sadly she actually has a good wig/weave this week compared to the usual. The song choice was decent for disco week, the performance was kind of blah. She missed a few notes, but nothing awful like the past few weeks. She may actually have a chance to stick around depending on if the other mediocre contestants throw this week (not, they put her behind the 8 ball seriously by making her go first). Lil becomes the ugliest bi-atch when she gets criticism, but then she breaks out the smile which she should show all the time.
GRADE: D+

Kris Allen - "She Works Hard For The Money" by Donna Summer - Kris goes back to the crutch guitar this week, setting him up for the same finish as Jason Castro (4th). His guitar playing is simpleton but not atrocious. I like the change of pace to make this not feel at all like Disco week but instead reggae week. Kris doesn't look bad, and his performance was OK if a little whiny. A solid performance on a surprising song. Bonus for the arrangement choice. Felt bad for Simon having to follow the best comment of the season "not a lot of guys shop in the women's section but you found something that fits perfectly." wow.
GRADE: B

Danny Gokey - "September" by Earth, Wind, and Fire - Danny picks a cheesy upbeat rhyme time song. Thankfully Danny went back to the glasses this week because his squinting is awful. Knowing what Allison is wearing, I cannot begin to bash the leather jacket and faded jeans look. Danny overuses the backup singers I think, which may make the difference in the end. Performance was full of yelling it felt like. Not his usual good performance at all. Good song choice but not a great performance.
GRADE: C

Allison Iraheta - "Hot Stuff" by Donna Summer - Hot stuff doesn't begin to describe this outfit. Patent leather stocking pants and a disco ball/leather top...apparently Allison is showing off her disco hard rock side. Seems a little inappropriate for a 16 YEAR OLD OMIGOSH...sorry they always say it to us every week. Allison does not do much with the arrangement but adds some glory notes at the end. Her performance is not bad but it felt like she was forcing things to hit this one, which detracted from the performance.
GRADE: C+

Adam Lambert -"If I Can't Have You" by John Travolta - Glambert does a Saturday Night Fever song and looks sharper in his suit than Ryan Secrest...hard to do! The difference between the Anoops of the competition and the Glamberts are that Adam actually can go from slow soulful to fast disco and back instead of sounding the same every week. Adam turns this song into a funeral march so he can crescendo up to a loud and borderline whiny chorus. He's solid otherwise.
GRADE: B

Matt Giraud - "Stayin' Alive" by the Bee Gees - Cute song choice Matt, really. Not the cheesiest thing ever, oh wait yeah it is. the red jacket looks like it needs to go back on the dead guy you stole it from. Matt goes back to jazzing it up by throwing lots of runs and shouts and glory notes in an otherwise boring arrangement. He's a fun guy but he throws stuff in that makes the song run not smooth. Falsetto break at the end did not help his cause. Definitely in trouble again but better than last week.
GRADE: C-

Anoop Desai - "Dim All The Lights" by - I swear there must be a run on Razors this season because now even Anoop has gone scruffy on us to match Danny, Matt, and Kris's gaystache. Anoop looks like he's a frat boy with an 80's suit, just missed the decade dude. The performance was more upbeat than normal and pitchy was back. I'll give him points for changing it up but the performance was enough to make this interesting coming from the usual safe money slot.
GRADE: D+

So I don't know what to think. No A's and no FAILS, although I'm sure VFTW disagrees. Maybe I'm too nice. Don't know if there's a bottom 3 or 4...usually this is where we go to bottom 2 ground, but perhaps with 2 going home we'll have 4 on the floor. So with that in mind...

TOP PERFORMER: Kris Allen
SAFE: Kris Allen, Adam Lambert, Danny Gokey
BOTTOM 4 BUT SAFE: Allison Iraheta
BOTTOM 3: Lil Rounds, Matt Giraud, Anoop Desai
GOING HOME: Lil Rounds, Anoop Desai

American Idol - The Cut to 6...NOT!

So they used the save in the next to last week. Hmmm. Guess they did not want to save Lil or Anoop. Makes sense, but Matt rightfully deserved to go home. Still chalking it up as a victory.

THIS WEEK: 1/1
FINALS: 4/7
SEASON: 10/16

American Idol Top 7 - Movie Soundtracks

So I did not watch the show back in Season 3 as you'll recall, but I guess Quentin Tarantino loves the show so much he's already been a guest judge once. Now he's a mentor, and this could lead to some worster delight as he is probably the craziest goober you'll ever see. I mean, when you make Andrew Lloyd Weber look like Fabio, you are an uber-goober.

(These are short because I did not liveblog the show, so sue me)

Allison Iraheta - "Don't Want To Miss A Thing" by Aerosmith - No shocker of a song choice here, which would be a theme of the night. She did not have a great performance, but it was solid enough on a weak night.
GRADE: C-

Anoop Desai - "Everything I Do" by Bryan Adams - So Anoop goes up there and crones out another slow melody while making funny overdramatic faces and not quite living up to the original. He has a consistent d-bag frat boy look. I see no future for him in music, really.
GRADE: C-

Adam Lambert - "Born To Be Wild" by Steppenwolf - Adam goes with upbeat again, flaming his way through the song and adding too many glory notes. He's back to weirdly sexual this week, but he still is better than most of these other jokers.
GRADE: B

Matt Giraud - "To Really Love A Woman" by Bryan Adams - Seriously? What the fuck? Can we get 7 different artists at a minimum when we're this far into the competition? Bryan Adams sucked, and Matt's performance is AWFUL. He takes all that goodwill from last week and trashes it in spectacular fashion.
GRADE: FAIL

Danny Gokey - "Endless Love" by Diana Ross - Gokey plays it safe, relying on his voice only as the song choice sucks and the performance is bland. Judges actually call him out on it. Bravo.
GRADE: D

Kris Allen - "Falling Slowly" by someone irrelevant - So Kris goes out and sings an unknown song from an unknown movie and the song turns out to be a boring funeral dirge that allows for no show of musical or singing talent whatsoever. Great choice, dumbass.
GRADE: FAIL

Lil Rounds - "The Rose" by Bette Midler - She decides to take on a big girl song again, but thankfully not Whitney or Celine. Still, she throws in a "gospel" switch in the middle of the song and proves why she is clueless and the worst contestant remaining. On the VFTW block's last effective week (statistically shown to end at Top 7) and the money slot, she'll barely be safe.
GRADE: FAIL

Wow. Glambert gets a B which could've been a C, and nobody else above C-. This season could be the worst set of contestants ever. Sad.

TOP PERFORMER: Adam Lambert (I guess by default)
SAFE: Adam Lambert, Danny Gokey, Allison Iraheta, Kris Allen (stupid tweentards)
BOTTOM THREE: Lil Rounds, Matt Giraud, Anoop Desai
BUH-BYE: Matt Giraud

American Idol - The Cut To 7

The results show was so bad, I skipped most of the performances after a few seconds. Anorexic Kelli Pickler and rapper's delight, blech. Plus the better half was out of town, so I could skip through as much as I wanted anyways. Nevertheless, I was right on for the first time in 4 weeks, as Scott indeed goes home. The judges really debated over saving him, which I think was 50% genuine because this is the first good contestant booted off this season and 50% being nice to the blind kid. If it's not Adam or Gokey going home prematurely, they will not use the save. End of story.

THIS WEEK: 1/1
FINALS: 3/6
SEASON: 9/15

American Idol Top 8 - The magic of the year you were born

The title and top 8 comes at an appropriate time as I went to my first magic tournament since December 2007 (wow right!?) and got 10th place out of 99. Should've cashed, but ran into bad luck against two guys who ended up 1-2 in the swiss. But that's neither here nor there. We have a top 8 to resolve on American Idol, and that's why we are here.

And as for the theme, woot to the strong 1980's and 1990's theme tonight. We'll see if anything genius washes out like Archuleta's most boring song ever last year.

Danny Gokey - 1980 - Stand By Me - The Gokey takes it down a notch and sings something soft this week, which is a decent change of pace for him. He still oversings a bit, but his soulful voice doesn't make it seem to bad. I think he really forced too much into the song, and by the end, it was the upbeat point at the screen crap again. Solid purple shirt and black suit. Mediocre by his standards.
GRADE: C+

Kris Allen - 1985 - All She Wants To Do Is Dance - Oh joy another week of retarded mosh pit fan show for Kris Allen. They have to stop that. Kris's guitar playing doesn't seem to add much to this song, but at least he looks better than usual. Still needs to shave the faux-moustache. A jazzy sort of arrangement is admittedly different, but I don't know that it was a good choice. Pretty safe choice I think, and a flat performance.
GRADE: C-

Lil Rounds - 1984 - What's Love Got To Do With It - If there's one thing Lil needs to learn, you don't need to match the exact appearance of each singer and the year they performed the song. What normally would be cute has become a bore. She shouted the back half of the song and turned what looked promising into pretty crappy. She may find herself in the bottom three with this kind of safety dance effort.
GRADE: D

Anoop Desai - 1986 - True Colors - Aww cute he was born on the same day as David Cook. Too bad, we've filled our quota and he's better than you. I like the idea of the tie and unbuttoned collared shirt, but then he slaps a whole slew of gay lime green sweater on it. Icky icky. At least he won't be hit in traffic if he jaywalks, as nobody wants that color smeared on their car. I speak of all this because his slow performances bore me. It's what he does best, but again this seemed like too safe a choice. Good performance though. The roller coaster continues.
GRADE: B

Scott MacIntyre - 1985 - The Search Is Over - Wow Scott can play guitar too? McBlind is showing talent, well if he ever starts playing it. He's actually hooked to a noticeable amp, and I don't mean just that we can see it on the stage. We can hear his playing, and while it's not perfect, it's realistic. McBlind's hair is a lot less MacGyver this week thank God. The song choice was good but he really missed some notes in there and did not sound great at all.
GRADE: D

Allison Iraheta - 1992 - I Can't Make You Love Me - Apparently there was a sale on cheap leather outfits for ladies this week in the glam crew, as we're 2 for 2. I get the feeling that they keep telling us she's 16 to try and help her, but she'd really have been better served being on the show at 18 probably. Nevertheless, Bonnie Raitt is a good choice for her voice and she did a nice job. Safe from the bottom three perhaps, which would be an accomplishment.
GRADE: B

Matt Giraud - 1985 - Parttime Lovers - This performance must have been inspired by Stevie's performance last week. Totally creepy grinding of Paula on Simon during the song. Matt is trying to be the bluesy guy with the look and he pulls off the performance. I don't know about the song choice, but good job overall.
GRADE: A-

Adam Lambert - 1982 - Mad World - Well I'd love to say something wonderful about the Glambert again, but Idol found it perfectly OK to try and fit 100 commercials into an hourlong show and my DVR cutoff before he even started. Bunch of fucking wankers. Learn to schedule Idol, honestly. Anyways, saw it online and performance was good, but normal Idol crap. Of course Simon and company loved it, but would you expect anything less?
GRADE: B

Can't believe Gokey is about 5 years older than pretty much everyone in the competition. Anyways, ...

TOP PERFORMER: Matt Giraud (yes really)
SAFE: Matt Giraud, Adam Lambert, Danny Gokey, Allison Iraheta, Anoop Desai
BOTTOM 3: Scott MacIntyre, Lil Rounds, Kris Allen
BUH-BYES: McBlind (even with the VFTW support)

American Idol 8 - The cut to 8

Well another week, another boring results show. But at least the worster went out in style. Speaking of worsters, Amanda Overmyer is looking for a "shredder" a.k.a. lead guitarist for her band. If you live in Indiana and can shred, go be a legend supporting a worster legend! I thought the worster vote block would be more powerful, but oh well. I did nail the bottom 3.

THIS WEEK: 0/1
FINALS: 2/5
SEASON: 8/14

American Idol Top 9 - American Top 40 Crap

So we have what made the Shadowbox skit of Seacrest and Kasum work, the American Top 40. So a lot of winners made the crap top 40 chart and sell a lot of records. We'll see what these guys pick, but this is bound to be a wheelhouse week of signature badness yay. I picked my most favorite songs ever.

Anoop Desai - Caught Up by Usher - Anoop leads off with a typical mistake, he sings it just like Usher and doesn't do it well (or at least not as good as Usher). That jacket with the shoulder chain is so stupid it hurts, and the popped collar is awful. Anoop is much better upbeat, but this was a bad song choice and his long notes were hard to listen to. Not a lot to like about this performance, and given the opening slot he could be in trouble. Anoop as R&B...hmmm....
GRADE: D

Megan Joy - I Wanna Give You Some Good Lovin by Bob Marley - Wow how many boob shots did you do this week to get all those beads? Marley was a good choice for her because those songs sound normal when slurred and in a weird voice. She went all nasal at the end, and was her usual weirdness. Very boring song and no bird dance. Will keep the VFTW crowd going.
GRADE: D

Danny Gokey - What Hurts The Most by Rascal Flatts - Danny saw Adam break it down to basics and must have loved the reception as he goes with the violin lead solo and soft feel. Danny looks good as usual, the glam crew did not make him terrible. His big notes were a little off tonight, but he's still got one of the best voices left. This was just a poor song choice, but he seemed to say that he got forced into it. Judges got on their knees for him, so congrats on figuring out the Idol formula.
GRADE: B-

Allison Iraheta - Don't Speak by No Doubt - OMG she looks exactly like Gwen Stefani, that's her inspiration for the hair and all! She does look a little ridiculous and the dress is stupid. Allison has a good voice but this was indulgent nonsense in the Simon way of thinking. The guitar added nothing to the performance. It sounded way too karaoke for this competition, but in this week it will probably be good enough.
GRADE: D

Scott MacIntyre - Take You Just The Way You Are by Billy Joel - The stylist went too far in the other direction this week and made him look ridiculous. Scott goes back to the bread and butter with the slow Billy Joel song. At least Scott knows how well he fits into this role and doesn't experiment too much. Macblind could be saving himself this week with all the awful performances by playing it safe.
GRADE: C+

Matt Giraud - You Found Me by The Fray - Matt picks a contemporary song that fits his voice well, but he's just going to be compared to the original on the radio and fall short. The soft part of the chorus was done all wrong I think as he puts extra into it. The leather jacket is not god-awful, so no complaints. Matt shows his skill at the piano which is a lesser appreciated aspect of his game now. Still a bad take on a too contemporary song.
GRADE: C-

Lil Rounds - I Surrender by Celine Dion - So she picks a song choice to make out with the judges, yay more Mariah, Whitney, and Celine. Blech. She goes all ghetto ugly look this week. Stay with the short hair. Beautiful dress though. The performance was god-awful as expected since Celine is always oversung and shouted. She was off on the notes she should have hit. This was truly a bad performance. Judges liked it but I don't know why.
GRADE: FAIL

Adam Lambert - Play That Funky Music (White Boy) by Wild Cherries - This looks like it will be a mash up of the Satisfaction and Ring of Fire performances. Mediocrity plus sexuality. Better than country week though. This was a weird song choice but he showed a great range on the song and this turned out brilliantly. Could have done without the glory note, but whatever. The look fit the song and the era.
GRADE: A

Kris Allen - Anal (?) Sunshine by ?? - I know the song is "Ain't No Sunshine" but that's not how it come sout of his mouth and it's distracting. Kris goes to the piano because it's keeping Scott and Matt around, although not out of the bottom three. Maybe Kris wants to go home? Well not out of the money slot. The facial expressions are awful, but he was ok.
GRADE: B+

So lots of indulgent nonsense and Adam takes it for a second straight week. He is the frontrunner for more than just myself all of a sudden. Let's hope he doesn't barf on his feet right after the judge's save goes away.

TOP PERFORMER: Adam Lambert
SAFE: Adam Lambert, Kris Allen, Danny Gokey, Scott MacIntyre, Matt Giraud, Lil Rounds
BOTTOM 3: Anoop Desai, Megan Joy, Allison Iraheta
PACK YOUR BAGS: Anoop Desai

American Idol 8 - The Cut to 9

Well all guys in the bottom three, which was a surprise. Sarver is gone, but top 10 is perfect for him so bravo. He was outclassed and away you go.

THIS WEEK: 1/1
FINALS: 2/4
SEASON: 8/13

American Idol Top 10 - Motown's Anniversary Sullied

I write the title before I know for sure how the contestants will do, but I'm guess we're in for some fail. Especially considering the contestants owe us after country week. Will we be down to 2 girls after this week? Let's find out if Megan and Allison can survive the sausage fest that is American Idol season 8.

Matt Giraud - Let's Get It On by Marvin Gaye - Interesting that Matt sits at the piano for the second week in a row, as it did not seem like his vibe coming into the finals. Let's Get It On is a little spicy for American Idol, but this shows promise for the rest of the show. Sweater vest look is very classic and not bad. His performance was good, but he did not hit everything. Still a relatively memorable performance by Idol standards.
GRADE: B

Kris Allen - How Sweet It Is by Marvin Gaye - The military looking jacket with the tie probably looks cool to someone, but it looks retarded 80's to me. Another terribly overdone Marvin Gaye song, even more so than Let's Get It On. I'm sure his guitar playing is great Smokey but we cannot hear it with the band, so oh well. Kris picked a good song for his voice and should be safe with this solid performance. Retarded glory note at the end took away a bit.
GRADE: B

Scott MacIntyre - You Can't Hurry Love by Diana Ross - Go get em ladies, Scott is not-shockingly available. Scott pimps the brown and pink combo which works well on my daughter, but not so much on the shirt he wears. Scott seems relatively flat in this song and maybe it's because the song is more upbeat than his usual. The performance did not get much better but he is solid on the piano. You know you've done bad when Paula will not rank you higher than the other two guys and avoids the question by giving crayons to Simon. Ouch.
GRADE: D+

Megan "what the hell is your name pick one" Joy - For Once In My Life by Stevie Wonder - Wiw it looks like she's dressed in a Hawaii cocktail dress and ready to go to a lu-au. How is it that Scott doesn't sing the Stevie Wonder song? This performance is so bad it's unspeakable. She's falling off the notes and the performance makes no sense. It's as if she decided to force this song into the jazzy realm and then decided to shout and growl through it. She definitely earns the VFTW title this week. Good luck honey.
GRADE: FAIL

Anoop Desai - Ooo Baby Baby by The Miracles - So Anoop gets good commentary on one slow-song performance and now he'll do funeral march pace every week. Le sigh. The outfit is borderline douchy because of the jacket. Anoop shows off his pipes, but I felt like this was way too safe of a bet. Plus it doesn't look like he's really feeling it. Mediocre job.
GRADE: C

Michael Sarver - Ain't Too Proud To Beg by The Temptations - Michael Sarver has clearly told the glam crew, I like wearing button down shirts with open collars and suit jackets. I love the look because I'd pimp it too. After the past two performances, I really want to like this performance just because it is upbeat. The reason Sarver avoids slow songs is that he would get exposed, and there were moments in this song that showed his weakness compared to the other contestants. Not a great performance.
GRADE: D+

Lil' Rounds - Heat Wave by The Vandellas - Oh great, so in the wheelhouse week let's throw the black history up and let's pretend Lil' is all emotional. Over the top idol. Speaking of over the top, Lil' switches the look and adds hair extensions of a wig to look a bit more girly. The dress is a colossal disaster. I feel like she shouted and rushed too much even for the uppace song. She got better towards the end, but this was not the smashing performance I expected for a wheelhouse week. Oh thanks for dropping the Obama...effing Black History Month was February y'all hicks.
GRADE: C

Adam Lambert - The Tracks of My Tears by Smokey Robinson - So a week after bubbling with Middle Eastern sexuality, doogie houser comes straight out of the 1960's with a slick hairdo and retro suit. The appearance is over the top, but cool job reinventing yourself yet again Mr. Lambert. The soft ending was actually pretty cool. Not the best we've heard from Lambert, but very close. He will keep throwing screwballs until he misses again.
GRADE: A-

Danny Gokey - Get Ready by The Temptations - Danny is like Sarver in that he's pretty solid with the outfits as long as he doesn't bring that ski jacket back out. The marching with the backup singers was too cheesy. Danny has put his Seal-esque soulful spin on a good popular song, and he performed well. He needs to stop the pointing at the screen. Decent performance but not one of his best.
GRADE: B-

Allison Iraheta - Papa Was A Rolling Stone by The Temptations - Well this will test the theory about the money slot being untouchable, as she was in the bottom 3 last week and America seems to hate her. The outfit looks like fail, but for some reason it works with Allison's vibe. Unfortunately the same cannot be said for the song choice. Allison growled through it and is looking like a slightly more talented version of Amanda from last season, which bodes badly. The ending was hotter than the rest but she needed more leading up to it.
GRADE: C-

So they did a nice set of songs and lots of ugh. However, the back end of the show was strong because it was backloaded with Lambert and Gokey, who will be your final two unless Lambert punts it away. Simon laughing at the crayon moustache on Paula at the end was priceless. Yay to live TV. So we have...

TOP PERFORMER: Adam Lambert
SAFE: Matt Giraud, Kris Allen, Anoop Desai, Lil' Rounds, Adam Lambert, Danny Gokey, Allison Iraheta (thanks to the money slot)
BOTTOM 3: Scott MacIntyre, Megan Joy, Michael Sarver
BUH-BYES: Michael Sarver, VFTW saves Megan one more week

American Idol 8 - The Cut to 10 and the tour

So it looks like Dirty It Up will not be on the tour. No big loss there. Was a bit shocking to see Alexis and Allison in the bottom 3 with Sarver, but the girls have no cred with America this season. So the tour will be 7 dudes and 3 chics, but what can you do? Will keep the tween tards happy.

THIS WEEK: 0/1
FINALS: 1/3
SEASON: 7/12

American Idol Top 11 - Grand Old Opry YeeHaw!

Get ready y'all. Honky Tonk Badonkadonk is on the song list, but will anybody sing it? Grand Old Opry Week means country week comes early, and people always do terrible on country week. Let's see who can channel their inner Carrie Underwood or Taylor Hicks. Who will be on the tour? Last year we lost Amanda Overmyer on this week, but let's hope our best contestants don't leave tonight.

Michael Sarver - "Ain't Goin Down Till The Sun Comes Up" by Garth Brooks - Awesome, the band has a groupie with a doofy face who can play some harmonica. Michael's voice was a little wavery, but he hit all the lyrics which is difficult in that song. He should've sung the song more like himself instead of fixing his voice to Garth Brooks, as it really hurt his chorus performances. Michael was mediocre tonight, but that might be enough to send him on the tour. The outfit was classic Michael, which means normal.
GRADE: D+

Allison Irahata - "Blame It On Your Heart" by Patty Loveless - This was a brilliant song choice I think because Allison was able to make it sound a little rockabilly country, at least more than the original. Someone needs to shoot whoever tried to match her leather jacket to her red hair though. She hit the high notes the way she can and did a fabulous job with this one. The judges loved it and rightfully so. Could be the best performance of the night, a girl frontrunner maybe?
GRADE: A-

Kris Allen - "To Make You Feel My Love" by Garth Brooks - This guy is like a slightly more appealing Archuleta in my book, and I probably need to stop putting him in the bottom 3 because the tweentards love him too much. This performance bores me. He seems solid on the pitch and the notes, but again he's just so stereotypical and boring. Did not show us much of anything this week, but will make it through. Of course the judges like his vulnerability. Barf.
GRADE: B-

Lil Rounds - "Independence Day" by Martina McBride - Randy Travis is right, this is an amazingly big song, which should come as no surprise from Lil. The pink dress is not bad on her, but maybe she should've gone American Flag print to get country votes. It got a little shouty at the end, but the McBride song was kind of rough too. Lil did a nice job with the chorus, but the long verse was not the best. Should've put a little bit more Lil R&B flavor on it.
GRADE: C+

Adam Lambert - "Ring of Fire" by Johnny Cash - So Randy Travis thinks the black nail polish wouldn't have been worn by the man in black? Really? LOL! Lambert takes the Cash song and makes it kind of like Godsmack's voodoo in the first verse. I don't think it sticks very well, but Adam sells it. A little overly sexual, but the kiddies like the tension. His silver jacket is terribad, but again, it's Adam. Trouble brewing, and he'll be happy to escape country week after that performance. Simon: "what the hell was that?" Amen.
GRADE: D

Scott MacIntyre - "Wild Angels" by Martina McBride - I'm surprised this performance wasn't sponsored by the new McCafe at McDonalds. This McPerformance was worse than last week's surprising performance without the piano. Scott has great singing McTalent and is an excellent piano McPlayer, but this song was a McQuestionable choice. The guys this season need to cut the McFalsetto crap because they don't pull it off. Scott continues to be the best McDressed guy, which is sad considering he's mostly McBlind. He hit most of the notes, but a mediocre performance. He keeps this up, he'll earn the name McBlind.
GRADE: C+

Alexis Grace - "Jolene" by Dolly Parton - Well it doesn't get much more grand old opry than Dolly, so here we go. Alexis goes from "dirty it up" to a very beautiful patterned LBD which is the best outfit of the night. The performance was spot on, just like Randy Travis said. No country twang made it slightly plain, but this was still solid on a night of mediocrity and safeness. Judges said some pitch issues, but it sounded better than that to me.
GRADE: B

Danny Gokey - "Jesus Take The Wheel" by Carrie Underwood - The white jacket has got to go, it's springtime dude. The thing that's OK about this song choice is that he's making it his own soulful self instead of a girl trying to match a former Idol (and possibly the best). Danny puts his trademarked big long glory notes on it, but for some reason he's not as terrible as most Idol glory noters. Anybody else think they saved Jamar for Season 9 because he couldn't beat Danny?
GRADE: A-

Anoop Desai - "You're Always On My Mind" by Willie Nelson or Johnny Cash - That's a cute hoodie dude, maybe I can get that at Blind Navy. Ugh. If Kris Allen does this rendition of this song, the judges love him. Anoop, well we'll see but I'm guessing no. The song was a little boring and a mediocre choice, but Anoop thinks this is where his future is. I just don't think he'll be successful going that slowly. I was wrong, the judges sucked up the sappy because they all hate country and the only way to make it go away is sing like a funeral.
GRADE: D+

Megan CAW CAW Corkrey - "I Go Walking After Midnight" by Patsy Cline - This dress is nice and she looks classy, but like Carly last season she's pimping the distracting tattoo. She's back to the terrible arm swinging and stand in one spot twirl. She's a VFTW veteran already, but not this week unless she drops another CAW CAW. She did a nice job trying to change the song, but she missed some more notes than most tonight. She'll be in trouble again.
GRADE: D

Matt Giraud - "So Small" by Carrie Underwood - How much longer must this no talent d-bag from Detroit stick around. G-rod takes away his mediocre soul dance and sits down for a pianoman solo. You cannot go wrong with the black tie and suit, so props on that because he looks like a real legitimate performer. Unfortunately, this song was meh. This kind of felt like Justin Timberlake, but not in the good way. He was a little off, but he'll make it from the money slot because everyone always does.
GRADE: C+

So it was not quite the disaster it could've been, but as usual, country week was punted. Too many reworkings tonight and all of a sudden, Adam Lambert has a really bad night. This could be a judge save situation if he gets dropped, but I don't think he will. It will be close though.

TOP PERFORMER - Allison Irahata
SAFE - Allison Irahata, Danny Gokey, Kris Allen, Lil Rounds, McBlind, Alexis Grace, Anoop Desai, Matt Giraud
BOTTOM 3 - Adam Lambert, Megan Corkrey, Michael Sarver
BUH-BYES - Megan Corkrey

See you next week!

American Idol 8 - The Cut to 11

Well everything went as expected, but then they put Anoop Desai up against the Puerto Rican sensation, and of course Jorge went home. I thought I may have had at least half a point in Megan Corkrey, but alas, Jasmine went home. Found out next week will be grand old opry week, and I'm sure these two would've stunk that theme up something fierce. So the results!

THIS WEEK: 1/2
FINALS: 1/2
OVERALL: 7/11

American Idol 8 Top 13 - Toughest Theme Ever?

Welcome back to the finals! At long last, we have a final 12...ahem 13...mediocre contestants to shock and awe us. This week's theme is michael jackson. This is it...no really, this summer...this is it. Let's hope the cursed artist of Idol makes everyone very interesting tonight!

Lil Rounds - "The Way You Make Me Feel"
God awful dress, not even funny in 80's theme. Lil has probably the best voice of the remaining women contestants. This song was a little growly for her, but she tries her best to get the Mary J. Blige jive from a week ago. She really tried to add to much shoutiness to the song and it felt like she missed some notes. This was much poorer than before, but she'll probably stick around given the terribad theme! The judges homered for her again, except for Simon. OMG Paula is wearing the same crappy outfit for the loss!
GRADE: C

Scott MacIntyre - "Keep The Faith"
The blind man missed a note early or at least dropped it too quickly. But after that, he got rolling very well. Good song choice if a little safe. It's obvious he will be at the piano every week unless they rip him away, and that should let him make it to the final couple of shows if nothing else. Falsetto glory note wasn't that bad for Idol standards. Nice 80's style russian army jacket, goes well with the theme.
GRADE: B+

Danny Gokey - "P.Y.T."
This is like a perfect theme week for the Gokester. Actually a classy jacket with button down shirt, so that's nice. His dancing was more than terrible, but his singing was solid as usual. He bordeline shouts sometimes which is annoying, but I really have not much to rip here. Another solid performance from the frontrunner.
GRADE: A-

Michael Sarver - "You're Not Alone"
Another classy outfit, but usually it is the girls who make the worst impressions and we are shot on them. Michael has the cheesiest look and point into the camera, but the performance was good for him. He is stretching his voice as far as it will go, and he will not compete with Danny and Adam. Nevertheless, this cheeseball performance had no real weak spots except for the lead up to the end of the song. This goes out to all the oil riggers who've ever sung MJ...oh wait.
GRADE: B

Jasmine Murray - "I'll Be There"
Jasmine talks about the glam crew, then shows that they used taste on her. Not the cutest dress, but it looks decent on her. Jasmine returns to the frontrunner type of singing I saw before the semifinals. Good god she hangs a long ass glory note, but she hits almost everything. Good song for her voice and a solid performance. Where'd all the bad singers go?
GRADE: B

Kris Allen - "Remember The Time"
Oh good lord, the anti-hotness that is the country-western farmer pattern shirt with short sleeves. Goes with the guitar I guess. This song is iffy because the chorus is a lot of the backup singers. The verses don't have a lot of meat on the bones either, and Kris adds too much to overcompensate. His little vibratos and mouth movements don't help and this is a danger zone in my opinion. Of course the judges gave him more love than he was due.
GRADE: D+

Allison Irahata - "Give It To Me"
Allison is a little better on the video than impropmtu, as she was really clumsy in the semifinals. The glam crew has definitely cultivated the rocker edgy look for her voice, and it doesn't look as bad as I thought. Allison has a good voice for what she wants to do, but really she's just a better talented Amanda Overmyer. The glory note on the end was bad. Good enough.
GRADE: B-

Anoop Desai - "Beat It"
Wow, did not think anyone had the balls for this or Thriller or Billie Jean, but pleasant surprise! Wonder how much Idol paid to develop the ridiculous Matrix-like background. Anoop wears a tie under a windbreaker, which is interesting to say the least. This was a really ballsy song choice, as it really gives you no chance to show off. Anoop tried to look good in the verses where you can sing but song choice trumps all. Good energetic performance, but even Paula ripped him.
GRADE: D

Jorge Nunez - "Never Can Say Goodbye"
The Puerto Rican sensation goes way back to MJ's childhood, when the dysfunction started in the Jackson family. This song make Jorge seem a little whiny at times, but he takes some glory notes and runs with them. Terrible T-shirt under a suit jacket, but I guess that's his style. He did not have a flawless performance and this was too safe. Perhaps he will be in trouble despite his popularity.
GRADE: D-

Megan Corkrey - "Rockin Robin"
Good lord it's the same dress as last week! Same terribad flower just a different color. YIKES! Megan actually moved around and danced way more gracefully than the past two weeks. The performance was pretty good on a cheeseball song. She did get a little caught up in the moment and made a couple execution mistakes late, but this was better than before. Oh and then she drops "caw caw, caw caw" at the end. VFTW victory!
GRADE: C+

Adam Lambert - "Black and White"
The goth white kid goes with Black and White, wow another VFTW victory! Adam has his look, a little rougher David Cook. Pleather sky blue jackets are bad, but he made it reasonable. Nice little rocking bridge section which is what separates him from a lot of the others. This was a better song choice than Satisfaction, but he was good outside the shoutiness. Good enough to go through.
GRADE: B+

Matt Giraud - "Human Nature"
Matt goes from the dirty soulful dude to pianoman, which was totally unexpected. Props on being surprising, but his performance was crummy. It's not that he missed many notes, but he was clearly pitchy jumping and the song only gave him brief glimpses for his falsetto which I think he was trying to show off. He shows his sensitive side, but that's not really his thing I think. Judges need to stop the Justin Timberlake comparison. It's not true.
GRADE: D+

Alexis Grace - "Dirty Diana"
The girl who's "dirty"-ing it up picks such the stereotypical song for her role. Alexis is still dirty, but the LBD and stockings was actually more tame for her. This will be an interesting case study because Alexis got major screwed with the non-normal phone number since Idol only saves 12 phone numbers in a row. But she is in the money slot, and the performance was solid even if the song choice was not the best in the world.
GRADE: B

So Michael Jackson week will go down in legend, but they did not have too many bad moments. It's sad that the mediocre group of season 8 did better with MJ than the talented season 7 did twice with Beatles, but whatever. Two go home this week, so here's my picks...

TOM PERFORMER: Danny Gokey
SAFE: Lil Rounds, Scott MacIntyre, Danny Gokey, Michael Sarver, Jasmine Murray, Alison Irahata, Adam Lambert, Alexis Grace, Matt Giraud
BOTTOM 4: Kris Allen, Anoop Desai, Jorge Nunez, Megan Corkrey
GOING HOME: Anoop Desai, Jorge Nunez (adios beautiful brown men)

Semifinal Results III

Well another week, same old crap. 2/3 with Scott and Lil making it, Jorge was a surprise to me. The wildcard added 4 more people, leaving us with 13. Lucky 13? I think not.

SEASON RESULTS
This Week 2/3
Semifinals 6/9
Total 6/9

Also good time to look back on my pre-semifinal rankings and see where I was way off! Here's your semifinalists in order of my ranking.

1. Adam Lambert
2. Danny Gokey
3. Jasmine Murray
4. Scott MacIntyre
6. Lil Rounds
8. Alexis Grace
13. Michael Sarver
14. Meghan Corkrey
19. Anoop Desai
20. Matt Giraud
21. Allison Irahata
32. Jorge Nunez
33. Kris Allen

American Idol Semifinals III: Are We There Yet?

Are we finally there? What? THREE more nights of this crap before we get to the top 12? Ugh. Well, let's make the best of it shall we contestants?

Von Smith - "No Looking Back" - Ahh, the T-shirt and jacket look, priceless Idol. His voice is silky smooth, but he seems to be rushing his voice too much with the song. Gotta give more credit to the outfit noticing the red shoes to match the shirt, but nevertheless, this was just your average Idol performance. Song choice was awful in my opinion, but he did a good job. Good chances depending on how the others do tonight.
GRADE: B-

Taylor Vaifanua - "If I Ain't Got You" - If my daughter bouncing is her votes, then Taylor wins the night. Again the more contemporary you go, the easier it is to compare you to the real singer and see that you are not that good. Taylor is no Alicia Keys, and unfortunately, this song showed her weaknesses more than her strengths. The outfit was completely normal, except for the patent leather pants, but whatever. She was very forgettable despite a decent voice.
GRADE: C-

Alex Wagner-Trugman - "I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues" - I am thinking of the uber-dork as my boyfriend, and wow does it make that Elton karaoke performance go down smoother. His voice jumped pitch like that was his choice, and he lets out an animal roar between the chorus and the verse. Wow this is going to be ugly. Vote For The Worst candidate of the semifinals for sure! His outfit is not offensive, but he's a dork so no surprise there. Paula had to squeeze to say something nice, which is bad.
GRADE: FAIL

Arianna Afsar - "The Winner Takes It All" - Best song choice of the night, but it is also kind of a risky choice with a slow quiet opening in the semifinals. She was a little shaky initially too, which stood out, but she had plenty of glory notes to belt at the end. She missed the last one badly which stinks because she was good until then. Cute blue dress, which will serve her well back at McDonald's or wherever she is after this week. Making it contemporary does not mean slow it down. Ugh.
GRADE: D

Ju'Not Joyner - "Hey There Delilah" - Instead of pimping the Chikeize like I thought with the contemporary pop song, he slows down the song and makes it a soulfoul melody. Are the contestants actively trying to bore the shit out of me tonight? The leather jacket and such doesn't look bad on him, but might come off a little ghetto for the tweentards. Plus they will be asleep after this performance. He hit the notes, but who cares since it was so slow and he did not stretch at all.
GRADE: C-

Kristen McNamara - "Give Me One Reason" - Finally something a little upbeat. No real terribad outfits tonight, but Nathaniel will change that in a few minutes. The song choice was good because it fit her voice pretty well. She may not have been perfect on the notes, but it was pretty solid I thought overall. Very good performance that will put her in the mix tonight.
GRADE: B-

Nathaniel Marshall - "I Would Do Anything For Love" - He looks about as good as meat loaf in a low cut shirt...thanks for showing us the extra tats dude. Super cheese pointing to Simon on certain lyrics, but Normund has the cheese down better. Nathaniel actually has a solid voice, but this was an abysmal song choice. I have to imagine he's too scary to move on. Not even a good glory note at the end. Yuck. Go home.
GRADE: D

Felicia Barton - "No One" - More Alicia Keys, yay. The sequins under the leather jacket, let's just call it what it is, AWFUL! Just like Taylor, felicia picks a song by a great contemporary artist and fails to live up to anything close. Alicia Keys is the new Whitney, which means Felicia's pardon from the executioner will be short lived. Just all over the place until the end, and not a very good performance. Judges were much nicer than they needed to be.
GRADE: D+

Scott McIntyre - "Mandolin Rain" - I wonder if his buddy helper will be around for the group number tomorrow night. At least his friends know how to dress him, best outfit of the night. From the blind guy. Wake up contestants. this guy has the superstar voice and he picks a good song, which has been a rarity tonight and in the entire semifinals. Not quite as good as Danny, but he will be a big player in this competition I think.
GRADE: A-

Kendall Beard - "This One's For The Girls" - She pimps the Sarah Jessica Parker flower on the belt, which is a disaster. But she's way better than Kristy Lee Cook, who went far last season. She missed some notes on a song that's not terribly difficult. She belted too much at the end too. I'm really not as thrilled as I expected. Big personality and good song choice for her, but that was not a good performance.
GRADE: C-

Jorge Nunez - "Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me" - Here comes the Puerto Rico flavor they injected for us by forcing a PR audition round. I think I have that jacket, but the jeans are terrible. VFTW moment when he tries some melody in the chorus and shows his accent way more than he intends to. I don't get how the judges say they want P-Rico talent but they want this guy to sing more American. Hmm, The song choice was not good for him, and it was a little boring. He played it OK, and tries to get the judges with a glory note on the end. It gets Paula, go figure.
GRADE: C-

Lil' Rounds - "Be Without You" - I wondered how she would handle the s-word in the song, but she just skips it. A very good dress. Very good song choice for her, even though it started off choppy. She'll make it through because they pimped her to, otherwise this might be a very close call. Simon doesn't lik eit because she sounds too much like MJB, which basically means she will step up and finally fill the ranks with more minorities (non-white and female, which was lacking after 2 weeks this season).
GRADE: B+

This is another tough round, but more because there were not many people who stepped up and did a great job. The finalists from this round should be happy they did not go last week, as they would've been killed. Idol producers clearly tailored the order of contestants and gave the money slot away to three people they really want to push. Hope that doesn't continue in the finals.

WELCOME TO THE TOP 12: Scott McIntyre, Lil' Rounds, Kendall Beard
WILD CARD POSSIBILITIES: Von Smith, Kristen McNamara
BUH-BYE: Alex Wagner-Trugman, Arianna Asfar, Ju'Not Joyner, Nathaniel Marshall, Felicia Barton, Jorge Nunez, Taylor Vaifauna

Semifinals Results II

Sometimes I need to follow my grades better. I almost put Kris Allen in the mix for a wild card, but oh well. The two obvious picks were Adam and Allison, and they are both through. No Nick sadly, but we'll always have that performance to remember.

This puts the season results at:

This Week: 2 out of 3
Semifinals: 4 out of 6
Season Total: 4 out of 6

American Idol Semifinal II:

And here we go with week two of the semifinals. Thanks to Barack's endless droning in primetime television, AI comes to us a day later than usual. Tonight we have a couple more real competitors, led by my pre-season pick over Danny Gokey, Adam Lambert. Also on the docket is the enigma of the semifinals, Normund Gentle. Let's just hope the performances are better and the competition more fierce. Last week was too easy!

Jasmine Murray - "Love Song" - Wow the beginning of this song was way off what we all know on the radio now, and I don't know that it will work on such a contemporary song. The silver jacket needs to go back to the 80's as well. Unlike the Archulator, seems like the teens this year just are not mature enough. The song almost got whiny, but it never seemed on pitch. She took too many liberties and did not perform well at all. More people having fun and not singing well. Could be the scary recurring theme of Season 8.
GRADE: D

Matt Giraud - "Viva La Vida" - More contemporary and again we have someone trying to add too much to the song. The problem is Matt's voice is pretty solid for the first part of the song, but his chorus is awful because his voice cannot possibly hope to do what Coldplay's singer does. His outfit is the best part of the performance, but not much else looked up. As the wife says, "that just blew a big one."
GRADE: FAIL

Jeanine Vailes - "This Love" - So the producers continue to dump on this girl by not showing her at all until now and then showing her tripping over a table. Well the hilarity ended right as she tried to hit some strong notes in Maroon 5. The booty shorts and heels probably don't sell to the right portion of America for this round. She was pitchy and more poor song choices. Goodness will anybody step up?
GRADE: D

Nick Mitchell - "I'm Gonna Make You Love Me" - This is for Group 2 indeed. I'm happy to see Normund Gentle came back out to play, this time in a hot white tailcoat. His own creation of a song had some pretty funny lyrics, including a glory note he actually hits. To be fair he actually did a fair job considering his voice. Simon was harsh, but horrific comedy and the jump kick response sells. He is an entertainer even if not a great singer. Definitely a chance to get America's vote, but wow this will be a surprise how people vote.
GRADE: B+

Allison Irahata - "Alone" - It must be pull out the "who?" night as faceless wonders of the preliminaries go up against Normund Gentle. Finally we have someone picking a non-contemporary song. She is terrible in the pre-song interview, but she at least is not wearing something atrocious. She defnitely has more maturity than the other teens, which is refreshing in the song. She may not have hit every note, but she was confident and was very solid. Surprising performance.
GRADE: B

Kris Allen - "Man In The Mirror" - This guy has the stereotypical idol douche-bag look, but his voice is pretty solid. The song choice was not very risky, but it could seriously pay off tonight. This all depends on how America feels about this nobody. The judges were terribly harsh, and well I just run out of words as there's not much to say about this performance.
GRADE: B-

Megan Corkrey - "Put Your Records On" - This will be an interesting experiment like Carly-plant. Will tattoos sell? Especially on a Brooke-White type? I don't like how she doesn't grab the mic and move around stage, which leaves her performance lacking. Her voice is good, but even the added glory note could not save this performance. Just average, and the recent performances tonight makes that not good enough.
GRADE: C

Matt Breitzke - "If You Could Only See" - I definitely thought this song choice was good for his voice, but we'll see. I swear this guy has welding jackets and 20 versions of the same kung-fu vibe shirt. Hey pimp what you got. He does a faithful rendition of Tonic, and it's very good. I am surprised because I did not think he was a sure-fire top 12 contestant. I think this was a good performance but a really extremely easy song, and the judges harped on that.
GRADE: B

Jesse Langseth - "Betty Davis Eyes" - The one-shoulder look is not that hot, but I've seen worse on this show especially. Jesse picked a song she loved, which means she's merely OK at it. Her facial expressions are too over the top in my opinion. Also another safety-type song, although not to the degree of Tonic. All of a sudden, the night has become average. Better than last week, but just average.
GRADE: C

Kai Kalama - "What Becomes Of The Broken Hearted" - If more chest hair popped out of this guy's open shirt, he'd be too rated-R for the FCC. In all seriousness, Kai takes a pretty basic song and adds his flavor to it. Other than the unbuttoned shirt, the outfit was good and the voice was good...but he's really right with the other top guys of the night. He could get lost in the mix.
GRADE: B-

Mishavonna Henson - "Drops of Jupiter" - Her voice and facial expressions are a little too serious in the opening of the song. This is probably the best rendition of a more contemporary song tonight, mostly because she obviouslyt doesn't try to match her voice to the guy lead singer of Train. Her dress is very cute as well. Simon had it spot-on, in that it was too serious.
GRADE: B

Adam Lambert - "Satisfaction" - Adam is certainly more cocky than even Danny Gokey, which may bite him in the ass. his all black outfit with the big chains is about what I expect from him, even though the hair is too goth. Interesting song choice, but it gave him a chance to show off his voice. I think he's still better than everyone else tonight, but he'll need to improve to be the darkhorse number 1 I had him pegged for. Judges love him, so he'll live to see another day.
GRADE: B+

So on the night, this group is a lot better than the first. However, there's a lot of decent and mediocre in this group and nobody really stood out. I wouldn't be surprised to see me get all three right, or none at all. Let's take a chance at it...

WELCOME TO THE TOP 12: Allison Iraheta, Adam Lambert, Nick Mitchell

WILD CARD POSSIBILITIES: Mishavonna Henson, Matt Breitzke

BUH-BYES: Kris Allen, Jesse Langseth, Kai Kalama, Kris Allen, Jasmine Murray, Matt Giraud, Jeanine Vailes

Semifinal I Results

Well whomever decided to make the results show an hour long again needs to be shot. We did get to see has been Carly-plant Smithson and Michael "should've been around longer than Archuleta" Johns from Season 7. Have fun being nobodies again guys.

Results were good, as Danny Gokey stole the night for sure. They sort of sapped all the drama out of it by putting Danny at the end of the show against Tatiana, but at least we had a chance of Tatiana meltdown. I was also right on the Alexis Grace pick, and Anoop came within 20K votes of third finalist Michael Sarver (who was one of my wildcard possibilities). So we'll call it...

Semifinals: 2 out of 3
Season Total: 2 out of 3

American Idol Semifinal I: A Loaded Bunch

Welcome to the first night of American Idol blogging for 2009, season 8. Semifinals is simple Billboard Top 100 songs, so pretty much anything goes.

Jackie Tohn - "Little Less Less Conversation" - Sounds like her voice has gone downhill since the auditions, as she chose too deep an Elvis song. The black spandex hotpants are hurtful to look at with that top too. It's as if she wants to keep the opener interesting. The busting out an almost rap midway through the song was misplaced. She missed the ball on this one. Judges were too kind, but Simon did not hold back.
GRADE: D

Ricky Braddy - "A Song For You" - Song choice may fit his voice very well, but I think it is a disaster in a heavy cut 25% move on format. He was boring and faceless before, and this is not much better. At least we found out he's a bravado crooner, as Kelley would say. Classy outfit though, which is a plus. He's just a little too weird, but who knows...maybe a wild card. Judges loved it like Archuleta.
GRADE: C+

Alexis Grace - "Never Loved A Man" - This was one of my secondary frontrunners coming into the semifinals. She picked a huge Aretha song, and it was a bit much for her. She does have the talent to be good, but it's risky picking Aretha on a semifinal night. The little black dress fits her new "dirty it up" personality, and she's a decent performer. I think she's in trouble if there are other good female contestants tonight. Which is a disappointment, honestly. The judges made a darkhorse Kelly Clarkson reference...she's not that good yet.
GRADE: B-

Brent Keith - "Hick Town" - I never know how I feel about people who pick songs with group choruses...kind of covers the voice and Brent's is not great, even for country. This was an indulgent blathery that doesn't speak to the right voters. He should look into the CMT Idol show because he's OK, but not great. He has his style and he dresses appropriately, but buh-bye.
GRADE: C-

Stevie Wright - "You Belong With Me" - Definitely playing the teen vote here, which will help her. She sings and looks like the oldest seventeen year old I've ever seen. She's got the Hannah Montana vibe and my a slip in as a wildcard, but it would be very undeserved. She needs some seasoning as she's not taking the appropriate amount of risks with that song. She's as good as gone.
GRADE: D

Anoop Desai - "Angel of Mine" - A Monica song, eh? Another contestant picks the classy suit jacket and jeans style. It's like David Cook all over again lol. He kind of missed the middle bridging notes in my opinion, but he picked a song that shows off his voice. He actually did a pretty good job and will be in the mix on a night of solid guy contestants. Maybe I should've joined the country in picking this guy to my top 12.
GRADE: B-

Casey Carlson - "Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic" - Unfortunately, the slower parts of the song are where you can stand out on this Sting song, but Casey punts. The chorus is OK but forgettable. The outfit is also just mediocre. Awful song choice. All in all, a very forgettable and mediocre performance. Adios and adieu.
GRADE: FAIL

Michael Sarver - "I Don't Wanna Be" - I liked the song choice of Gavin DeGraw in theory, but he clearly picked a song that he loves as opposed to one that will move him forward. It's painful to see him go, but he drew a tough group of guys to compete against in night 1. Maybe America will surprise me, but the facial expressions and the voice were too funny tonight. Even the high notes were not there, a chance to shine. Too bad.
GRADE: D+

Ann Marie Boskovich - "Natural Woman" - I was hesitant when I heard the song choice, but she actually put a good spin on it. Definitely best outfit of the night on the woman side, just because she was willing to to not wear black or something ridiculous. Facial expressions were the only downside, as they were a bit much. However, I think this may be enough to get her through. Judges were a little rough, and Ann dished back which is worth some points. Priceless moment on the "oh I sat on the hard part" and Secreast rushing to commercial.
GRADE: B-

Stephen Fowler - "Rock With You" - The smile was cheesy for a Michael Jackson love song, but he has a very smooth voice. Nothing outlandish about the outfits...oh where oh where have the Brooke Whites gone. Oh wait I forgot the beginning of the show. Don't know how I felt about the long hold note in the middle, but he did not miss anything by my take. I think he's got a real chance to overcome his glitch in Hollywood Week. Wow the judges disagree with me.
GRADE: B-

Tatiana Nicol Del Toro - "I'm Saving All My Love For You" - Sadly she came out with the Kristy Lee Cook look on her face, the confident I don't give a crap about my national reputation, I'm going to do what I want. A terrible dress, but that was expected from the drama queen of 2009. What's funny is she did not punt the Whitney song and would probably be sailing into the top 12 if it were not for the antics during auditions and Hollywood Week. I cannot believe it but I'm grading her higher than I ever expected.
GRADE: C+

Danny Gokey - "Hero" - Mariah Carey is risky, but hey baby...might as well roll the dice when nobody else is. He has a voice like Seal, and I think he actually will excel on his song choices alone. I'll be surprised if he shoots himself in the foot, and the money slot will be as good as gold for this frontrunner. Very solid performance that "redeemed the night" as Randy said.
GRADE: A-

So overall what did we learn? The most talented season ever brings a bunch more people who do not understand this is the harshest round of the competition cut-wise before the top 3. You have to bring your A game, and nobody really did. Fortunately for the frontrunners, they did not get passed by others stepping up. This is actually a very tough prediction, but here we go:

WELCOME TO THE TOP 12: Alexis Grace, Anoop Desai, Danny Gokey

WILD CARD POSSIBILITIES: Michael Sarver, Stephen Fowler

BUH-BYES: Jackie Tohn, Ricky Braddy, Brent Keith, Stevie Wright, Casey Carlson, Tatiana Nicol Del Toro, Ann Marie Boskovich

American Idol Preliminaries: Handicapping The Top 36

This year I plan to be a bit more in-depth about my picks and how I'm doing. I had a decent track record blogging the top 12 last season, hitting 6 of the 11 eliminations spot on and being fairly good at nabbing 2/3 of the bottom 3. As part of that, I've handicapped the field in my traditional grading style. Here's the breakdown...

A - True blue frontrunners, my picks to be singing in May
B - Possible Final 4 candidates, but likely just short
C - Definite Top 12 possibilities
D - Probably not going anywhere the next three weeks in the semifinals
FAIL - Go home. Now.

And now my handicapping from best to worst...

FAIL
36. Tatiana Nicol Del Toro - Most. Annoying. Contestant. Ever.
35. Nathaniel Marshall - my least favorite legitimate contestant. Stop crying and whining. Ugh.
34. Alex Wagner-Trugman - geeks have no place here, sorry mate.
33. Kris Allen - wins award for most forgettable white boy of season 8.
32. Jorge Nunez - American Idol may want Puerto Rico flavor, I do not.
31. Ricky Braddy - dude this guy is fail.
30. Ju'Not Joyner - blech. Chikeze failed, so will his copy.

D
29. Von Smith - This guy is too smug for America.
28. Felicia Barton - who cares.
27. Jesse Langseth - anyone else remember much from her? Me either.
26. Mishavonna Henson - Katharine McPhee wannabe, no thanks.
25. Jeanine Vailes - never even seen her...wow dumped on her producers.
24. Taylor Vaifuana - who?
23. Brent Keith - who?
22. Stevie Wright - great singer, not the right look.
21. Allison Irahata - who?
20. Matt Giraud - who?
19. Anoop Desai - lots think he'll go far, not me.

C
18. Casey Carlson - Only escapes a D on looks, which counts for top 12 potential in AI.
17. Matt Breitzke - doesn't have the chops that Sarver does, but blue collar all the way dude.
16. Jackie Tohn - She could go a lot farther than this, but she's a 50/50 shot
15. Ann Marie Boskovich - she'll get the tween-tard boy vote if nothing else.
14. Meghan Corkrey - Another solid Brooke White type
13. Michael Sarver - The oil rig dude has quite the chance if he makes it through his group
12. Kai Kalama - The dude with the fro, always brings home some votes
11. Arianna Afsar - Good stuff here, borderline top 12 though
10. Kristen McNamara - looks like a psycho but sings like an angel, it evens out
9. Nick Mitchell AKA Norman Gentle - As long as he's silly, he'll keep going. He's got talent too!

B
8. Alexis Grace - The pink-haired superstar showed up in force in Hollywood week 2
7. Kendall Beard - Perhaps another KKK, but she looks good so far
6. Lil Rounds - Meh, she'll go far because they hyped her, much like Gaspy
5. Stephen Fowler - you gotta be some kind of talented to not perform your last song and make it

A
4. Scott MacIntrye - blind guy FTW
3. Jasmine Murray - hottest chic voice in the competition, better than Syesha
2. Danny Gokey - music teach with sob story, but still my favorite so far
1. Adam Lambert - this cat looks like a winner to me, there's just that killer instinct there

Now all of this is subject to change, as this is just a snapshot of where they stand now in my mind. Lots of time to impress me between now and mid-May, as I wouldn't have pegged David Cook as my choice back at this time last year. Of course I knew a lot less about Idol then. Let's see if I can get all C's and above in the Top 12 (doubtful). No FAILS please.

Welcome to the new blog!

I skipped out on the American Idol phenomenon until season 6, when my wife and I followed along as Melinda Doolittle and Chris Sligh were upset by the boombox Blake Lewis and Jordin Sparks. Then in 2008 we got involved, and I blogged the season. I will now continue this for Season 8!

My Season 7 stylings are imported below, and I like to think along the same lines as Vote For The Worst. Let's get started!